Christine Kane suggests that her e-zine readers decide on a Word of the Year rather than making traditional resolutions. The idea is to use the word as a guide for how to live your life, set intentions and create goals. My 2010 word of the year is TRUTH. Here’s why:
1. Secrets = Missed Opportunities A friend didn’t tell her newsletter readers that her boyfriend has moved in. Why does that matter? As a divorce coach, there’s so much material to be mined there – talking to your kids about rules when a man moves in, navigating the ex’s feelings about your new relationship, etc. And yet, on some level, she had a belief that if she shared the news of her happy relationship, her readers and potential clients (those contemplating or in the midst of the divorce process) might feel she couldn’t relate to them any longer. True? Nope. She recently decided to tell the truth, and she’s feeling a lot better. Her readers will gain valuable insights from her experience, too.
2. No Secrets = Cleanliness I’m not talking about dusting, here. I mean having a clean spirit. As part of my coach training, I learned to clear myself of negativity, limiting beliefs, and other stuff that was getting in my way of being good coach. It’s a daily (sometimes hourly!) practice that helps me be truly present when working with my clients, as well as lead a happy life. For a long time, I hid from myself the secret of just how miserable I was in my former career. I got sick, and I got fat because I kept using food to avoid the truth.
My clients have hidden their desire to be entrepreneurs, fashion designers, chefs, nurses, writers, and any number of other things because they believe they can’t make money, their families will judge them harshly, or they might fail. They were miserable, scared, frustrated, and/or sick enough over living a lie that they called a coach.
3. Honesty = Freedom I once had to tell my boss that I’d made a five-figure mistake, and it’d likely cost us another five figures to clean it up. Keeping that a secret for any length of time would have cost me my job, but that’s not really why I told him about the error. I wanted the freedom that comes when we tell it like it is. Sure, I felt crappy for a while and it wasn’t much fun doing all the cleanup, but it was better than the alternative. Ridding yourself of a secret is like an act of confession. Losing the burden of a lie creates peace.
What are you hiding from yourself or others? What’s one thing about yourself that you really don’t want to know right now?
If truth brings opportunity, a clean spirit, and freedom, why live a lie? As a client said to me today “Courageous people aren’t fearless; they’re the ones who are scared and do it anyway.” Be brave, and get started. Speaking and living your truth will set you free.