I don’t know about you, but “I need your help” is one of the toughest things for me to say. I might occasionally utter the phrase “I need help,” in a vague, general sort of way, but actually telling someone that I need their help – well, that’s a whole other story.
I recently went on a road trip with my mother. A spry 73, she hates to admit that she can’t do everything by herself. I watched her struggle with luggage and almost fall rather than ask me to carry something for her. It’s easy to see where I got my independent streak from.
The vulnerability required to admit that we’re less than perfect seems to trip a lot of us up. We’re taught to be independent, to seem as though we’ve got everything under control at all times, and as the phrase goes, “never let ’em see you sweat.” To borrow from Dr. Phil, how’s that working for you?
I’m beginning to admit that it’s NOT working for me. So, I’ve decided to practice asking for help. If you know anyone who can help me with the following, I’d be grateful:
- ideas for speaking engagements (target audience: midlife women who want to make significant changes in their “status quo” lives)
- finding a good window replacement company
- bartering with a riding instructor for lessons
Now, it’s your turn. From whom would you like help? What’s stopping you from asking for it? If you’re fearing rejection, looking stupid or anything else, join the club. Then remember that doing things the way you always have (i.e., not asking) keeps you stuck.
If the people you’d like to ask for help are anything like me (and I suspect they are), they love to help others, especially when given specific information about what’s needed.
So, just ask already! After all, we’re all in this together.
